Fence

It must be very hard work to be someone's Dominant.

There is a story that circulates among people who teach young children and the same principles apply here. Someone did a study about young children. The teacher and a group of children walked out of a building into an empty yard without play equipment or fencing or any boundaries. The children stayed fairly close to the teacher where they felt safe. Most didn't go out to explore or play. Another time, the teacher and a group of children walked out of the building into the yard where there was some play equipment and a large field bordered by a fence. The children used all of the yard and all of the toys and didn't huddle around the teacher because the entire space felt safe to them.

This was an example of how most people need boundaries. They need to know where they feel safe and protected, where they can play without being harm or doing harm.

So i am imagining that a Dom is like being the fence, or constructing the fence for his sub. He needs to maintain it and make sure that there are things inside of the play yard that will encourage his sub and help develop her into the woman they hope she'll be someday. What an incredible task. Without the fencing, the boundaries, the safety, we may be fearful and we don't venture from our little tiny safe box. Or some of us may wander too far and get into trouble.

I have been told a time or two by about 10 or 20 people that i think too much and might benefit from just believing or accepting. So, to a fearful one like me who imagines that the fence might have holes in it where i can either get out or "things" can come in, i need to trust that the fence is built strong and will hold. And it does not need constant maintenance.